I wish someone had sat me down and had a real talk with me.

I wish someone had told me that yes there will be moments of absolute joy, but generally parenthood is relentless, repetitive and monotonous.

Not everyone feels that rush of love that is often spoken about when meeting your baby for the first time. It’s kind of a big expectation to have on a first meeting.

Breastfeeding. Not as natural as they tell you it will be. Unless your used to having a tiny being trying to suck your soul out via your nipple ofcourse.

Your birth experience absolutely matters. Speak about it. Just because you both make it out alive doesn’t mean the journey to getting there doesn’t matter. No ones birth story is a magical whimsical affair.

Babies are boring, and maternity leave is so hyped up. Unless you happen to have friends with babies of similar age – chances are you will be spending a lot of time alone. You will understand loneliness to a whole new degree, whilst simultaneously never having any actual alone time to recharge.

Your new favourite argument with your partner will be who is the most tired. Or who deserves a nap. Neither of you will win. Parenting is exhausting. Working is exhausting. Arguing is exhausting.

If you want something from your partner ASK. If you need something from your partner ask. If you need them to step up, tell them. Don’t bottle it up and get resentful. If you’re not the main caregiver it can be harder to figure out what is needed or how demanding it can be.

Babies grow at an alarming rate. Once they start to move life gets harder. You realise that keeping tiny humans alive is a lot harder when they are mobile.

You will end up in A and E. You will feel awful. It will happen when you turn your back for two seconds. Kids bounce back from injuries much quicker than adults. If in doubt ALWAYS follow your gut. You know your kid. You know when somethings not right.

You might feel as though you are not cut out for the job of being a parent. And you’ll be right. No one is cut out to be a perfect parent. BUT your child will love you and needs you to show up everyday for them.

Nobody really discusses how hard it is. Mainly because it’s shut down by people who remind us how much of a privilege being a parent is. And how we chose to be parents. But that doesn’t mean it’s not hard, and voicing how hard it is does not mean you’re a terrible parent.

Being a parent changes your core. It makes you softer. It makes news stories hurt because you realise that missing child has parents who must be out of their minds with worry. But it also brings out a strength. A mama bear strength.

Juggling work and raising kids is exhausting. No matter what you do some asshole will judge you. So you might aswell do what feels best for you if you’re lucky enough to have that choice.

The days are long but the years go quick. This is so true. But the other saying that helped me particularly through difficult times was ‘my child’s not giving me a hard time, he is having a hard time’.

Not every moment is cherishful. It’s okay. It’s pretty much why people pass this advice because no one cherishes moments all the time but we look back and feel we should have.

It is an amazing experience to raise children, but it’s not all butterflies and rainbows. You spend years changing nappies, potty training, to only be rewarded with mysterious floating turds in the toilet as they grow up and seemingly forget they need to wipe and flush.

They turn from being sweet little children into pre-teenagers who grunt, strop and no longer want cuddles. No one told me about this stage. Teenager stage yes, but I was not ready for this aged 8.

Although it is funny when they throw shade at you and you can kind of hear yourself in there.

Basically all you do for your children is never really recognised.

That is until they become parents too.